May we spread ourselves out a little more?

A popular hip chat show hostess in a well-known news channel played a collage of her many celebrity guests getting them to talk about homosexuality. She asked her guests, especially the intelligent and beautiful women, how they would respond if a homosexual made a pass at them. One gushed, “It is a compliment, right?” Another one quipped, “What’s wrong with a boy-boy and girl-girl!” A savvy lady remarked, “I am game to try it!” Somebody else discoursed on gay rights. Then, Shah Rukh Khan took off in his smug characteristic way sans any commas or pauses not without bringing up the topic of his supposedly asexual relationship with a film-maker of the same sex and how the two of them had been unduly linked time and again.



As a digression, the same filmmaker whom SRK named is a gay himself and poked fun at homosexuality (or is it homophobia? We are still confused on that bit!) in one of his films. As per homophobia, there can not be a cure for it as long as filmmakers who churn out such crass and gross humour continue to exist. Further, people will anyway continue to be sceptical and scared as long as his kind of hypocrisy exists…it is only human to fear when one can only suspect but doesn’t know for sure what is under the carpet. By the way, when was Kal Ho Na Ho released? Anyway…forget it. Moving on…


A worked up Baba Ramdev went on a protest on the show demanding, “Aap ko pata chalein ki aap ke pita ek ladke se rishta rakhtey hain yaa aap ki maa ek ladki se aisa karti tu aap ko kaise lagega? (What if you mother had a relationship with another woman or your father with another man?)”, only working up the poor anchor a little more than he was himself. Then he said, “If you want to marry do so like a heterosexual or remain a brahmachari (roughly put: celebate) like me.”



Gay rights is an overrated social cause. Now that homosexuality is decriminalized we must leave the issue alone or at least give the issue a break. I think it is just a glamorous cause for people to support. We live in a country where Dalits are being burnt alive in its dark corners and honour killings are not rare in lanes and by-lanes of Haryana. Agreed that though legalization has happened gays/lesbians are still being socially discriminated and it is sad – but looking at it that way, many more people are being discriminated on factors like caste, religion, social stratum and gender.


Anyway, it is heartening that, now that alternative sexual orientation is decriminalized, some innocent men who just went about their busness will be spared police harassment from now on and hopefully cases of closeted gays marrying women only to cheat…have clandestine relationships will come down.



Homosexuality is not bad or wrong and if I may add in the same very tone, it need not be glamorized or glorified either. Although it does not appeal to my aesthetics to see some men walking around with candy coloured nails to flaunt their orientation, I have absolutely no problems with these persons as long as they do not transform themselves into harassing eunuchs at traffic signals.



For instance, there are more people afflicted with cholera, typhoid and malaria in India than those with HIV/AIDS. But genuinely well-intending people, who matter or think they matter (whichever way), find it easier and/or more glamorous to spread AIDS awareness or cancer awareness than take it up to prevent other ailments. It is easier because it mostly only involves giving gyaan. While it is tougher to insist that villagers keep stagnant water clean in their vicinity; and tie up with local bodies and opinion leaders to really make things happen. But one can spread AIDS awareness sitting in a more comfortable zone.



In fact, AIDS is relative easier to prevent than other diseases plaguing India. We can leave cancer awareness out for the time being because there is no sure shot to prevent it. And while most people, especially the youth, are already aware enough to prevent HIV what can any NGO or anyone do if a few of them may anyway be too careless to have safe sex at the end of the day? (Of course, unsafe sex is not the only way HIV spreads). It out of our control and we can do so many things that are in our reach with a little more effort. We need to spread ourselves out a little more among other social causes that need workers.


It is just the same case with gay rights, it might just be a practically easier or relative more comfortable or a more hip cause to stand for compared to others. With all due respect to somebody like actress Celina Jaitely who reportedly lost out on work in the industry due to her work for gay rights/transgender rights, I really think we need more people who stand for other ‘less glamourous’ causes too. But let’s face it, only a few go as far as she does/did. A hurried sound byte or a good willed visit to an orphanage is what most celebs manage. Not many get out of their comfort zone for something they believe in.




Lakshmi Vishwanathan